Ah, the New Year. 2022 is in arms length away. Shiny, beautiful and gleaming with the promise of leaving behind the dumpster fire we called 2021. As we ready our New Years resolutions, after another trip around the sun, we try to embrace the, probably false, promise of a do-over and better things to come. Although the start of this blog is not intended to be a new year resolution or the venture of something grand and new, maybe somewhere down the road, I’ll be able to look at it that way. But for now, we’ll just call it what it is…..necessary.
“We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in the retrospect”
Anaïs Nin
I have always dabbled in writing and journaling. Reading and writing have always been close to my heart and have a healing power for me, and I don’t know why I don’t make more time to do it. Actually, that’s a silly thing to say. Of course I know why. Life. That’s why. And how sad is it that something so vast encompassed in 4 tiny letters could feel like it gets in the way of anything. After all, life is this. It’s what we are doing in this very moment. It’s what we did yesterday and what we have on the schedule for tomorrow. It’s all the tiny moments and tasks in the seconds, that make up the hour, that make up the day, that make up the year. So, how does it “get in the way” of anything? No, I think instead we just say that so we don’t have to deal with the fact that the things we don’t particularly care to do, can be considered part of our, hopefully, meaningful life. The life “fillers” that make up our day. This is our life. And one way to make sure we appreciate every moment of it, is to write about it. The re-live the moments and tasks we thought didn’t matter, but did. To remember that even the life “fillers” and mundane daily tasks, matter and are making up this thing we call our life. One day, we will wish we could just take one last boring grocery store trip with our significant other, or have one last argument over the stupid food battle at work, or endure one last morning of sickness from the pregnancy you thought would never end, but instead tragically ended too short. It’s crazy that only in retrospect, are the “filler” moments in our lives so precious. Moments we have taken for granted, all of a sudden mean so much.
The question is: how do we live in each moment and be grateful for what we have before it’s gone? How do we wade through the bullshit mind set of boredom, self pity and depression and make each second matter, no matter how seemingly inconsequential?
I don’t really know the answer to that question. But you can join me on my, sure to be comical, journey to finding out. Maybe we should call it a struggle, as I’m sure it will turn out to be. But this will be my new years resolution. To live with intention each day, not just on New Years Eve. To make each moment count. To choose to be happy and kind with all my tasks and “filler” moments. To remind myself daily that my interactions with others have an impact on them, as much as they do me. To cherish the smallest and most insignificant moments for what they are. The moments that make up life.
“Dear God,
On this day I ask you to grant this request:
May I know who I am and what I am, every moment of every day.
May I be a catalyst for light and love, and bring inspiration to those whose eyes I meet.
May I have the strength to stand tall in the face of conflict, and the courage to speak my voice, even when I’m scared.
May I have the humility to follow my heart, and the passion to live my soul’s desires.
May I seek to know the highest truth, and dismiss the gravitational pull of my lower self.
May I embrace and love the totality of myself. My darkness as well as my light.
May I be brave enough to hear my heart. To let it soften so that I may gracefully choose faith over fear.
Today is my day to surrender anything that stands between the sacredness of my humanity and my divinity.
May I be drenched in your holiness and engulfed by your love.
May all else melt away.
And so it is.”
Debbie Ford
Janet & Co. 